don't turn on the light

nothing. nothing but cats screaming. hundreds of them. maybe thousands. wont look. need gasoline. matches.

toy story

First there was a long darkness. rain water began to fill the light-
bulbs. The earth cooled. The rows of houses look like a line of dead
ants. Inside one of these houses is a small bedroom. Inside the small
bedroom is a small closet. Inside the closet there is a small wooden
chest. The chest begins to move slightly. it rocks once, twice, three
times and then tips spilling a wide array of toys. The teddy bears
blink their large glassy eyes. A stegosaurus rolls off of his back
onto sturdy legs and lets out a tiny roar. The army men find formation.
It is their forward spotter who sees through tiny binoculars the body
of the dead child -thin and yellow-- on the bed.
"what is it sarge?"
"its' god son."
"god?" The men murmur. "is he mad?"
"nope," the sergeant mutters. "just dead."

or

it is just after midnight. a phone rings. she is a mother when she
reaches for the phone but when she puts it down she is something else.
Just then a light blinks on in the closet. The toys rattle to life.
characters spring from the mildewed covers of comic books. a teddy bear
lights a cigarette and calls for quiet.

every day is never the same

the throwing knife whistled as it whirled plunk into the plank.

"nice shot heifer" one man said.
"yup." said another.
"damn." one explained quietly. "i'd hate to be that-there log."

There were tractors standing out from the hill behind them like giraffes in the savannah. One of the men snicked spit into the grass and adjusted his feed cap. The rest of them found time to let their eyes meander over the featureless swell of the yellow wheat-field, or perhaps it was canola. In some versions it is corn. The puffy white clouds who, until now, had been content to be beautiful and commonplace now decided to become something entirely miraculous. The clouds held hands until they had formed a sort of massive crown, the wind fraying the edges out into horsetail rays while the center remained a perfect circle. Unbelievably this went unnoticed. East of the men walked the elephant headed god Ganesh who pierced the faint daytime moon with a golden arrow.

"yup." said Heifer. "That-there log's been split good."

predator in exile

A man in the darkness of a summer forest will crouch low to protect his soft belly from the threat of the starry sky. his nostrils and pupils will dilate. his eyes become mouths that devour light. he will spread his fingers out as tight as a bats wing. he becomes acutely aware of distance. he is a mouse who must travel under the eyes of the owl. he is a predator in exile.

and in his heart he felt a sick rain.

kittens of doubt played around his ankles. the warped lumber of loss lay strewn in his garage. he felt the weeds growing higher than the garden. he felt too tired to
drive any further. notes from an accordion swarmed around his head like a halo of gnats. he believed that -like an octopus-- he could sense the vague magnetic fields that surrounded objects but, tragically, he had become blind to the objects themselves. there was a vibrating numbness. he thought he could distract himself by turning his thoughts into something ornamental. he was definitely too tired
to drive so instead he played cards.

1. Ace of Diamonds.

This is the gamblers favorite card. he flicks it into the air and shoots the diamond out from the center of a card with a long rifle. there is a silent report like the snap of a finger. this is not right. the gambler does not reveal the card to us but instead raises it to his lips. he kisses the card lightly with a wry expression. the diamond is lifted gently from the card in the gamblers lips (magic).

2. Three of Hearts.

This card does not exist. three hearts in union is as inconceivable to the modern scientist as it was to the ancient lover. debauchery and excessive flirtations or perhaps: mother, father, child.

3. Queen of Spades.

A trailer park matriarch. Shoeboxes full of photos and a bedroom full of cats. Lipstick tipped cigarettes. Her husband is dead but they are still on speaking terms. Her butterfly tattoo comes alive in the dead of winter and sticks like a postage stamp on the refrigerator door. The dolphin from her dolphin stationary swims off the page and grazes your cheek. You are disturbed to note that it feels like a cold hot-dog.

4. Seven of Clubs.

There is a fight in which one man is overcome by many. Their blows fall upon him in such number that he becomes numb. Curiously he feels as if he's overhearing the beating as its happening to someone else. he smiles and wonders what the guy did to deserve that.

He sees jesus wearing what appears to be christmas lights and he knows he must be dreaming. While at first this comforts him he then becomes alarmed and awakes. He pulls off the road as the dawn bends but doesnt break. he shields his face from the promise of light and imagines this as a short wooden bow pulled taut, then tight then
tighter still until
snap!
He falls asleep.

a whisper thick

alright kids, put this in your eye-holes.

sometimes, when both my hands are busy, i try doing a third thing just to see if i've suddenly developed Super Powers.

if someone asks you for something, act real mean-then act nice-then act mean, then admit you have no idea what you're doing or why. then do what they asked you to do.

pretend you have a good reason for treating someone really well.

pretend you don't know what day it is and then act pleasantly surprised when someone tells you. Follow this up by appearing to be very confused but happy.

a movie i wish i had seen: Hillbilly Leviticus starring Joe Don Baker

a dessert i wish i had eaten: Marshmallow Peanut-Butter Pudding

st valentines day

valentines day is the ruby centerpiece in the crown of loneliness.
the day that makes masturbation seem even more desperate, shameful and pathetic.
it is the holiday that bleeds whiskey tears.

but not anymore.

this is how we take it back.

imagine: the girl at the DMV who gave you her number, you couldn't call her because you were already in a relationship. that one time you kissed your boyfriends best friend on New Years and he bit your lip like he loved you. someone you could've or should've been with. the Nice Guy, the Bad Girl. we all have someone we wish we might have had, someone we wish we never lost. bring back the Secret Admirer. let your Id pass out the hard candies. feel neither shame or compunction.

just don't wait until youre drunk. or dead.


feel free to post all love letters in the comments section.