Monday, January 16, 2006

Porcine Bioluminescence

asian people give pigs super-powers.

Hopefully it will be my turn soon. Here's my wish list, in no particular order.

1.) Omnigastricity: The ability to digest anything. Mostly stuff like metal, plastic and hair. Although it would be cool to be able to digest lightning too.

2.) Diamond Fingernails: Fingernails that never grow and never break. Also you could cut glass with them.

3.) Neck Zeppelin: I want two giant sacs in my neck that inflate with buoyant gas whenever I become agitated/bored. You'll see me bouncing into the classroom ceiling like a stray party balloon.

4.) Womb in my forehead: The only thing i can't decide if the womb should give birth to my ideas or actual babies.

12 Comments:

Blogger Quaddle said...

Where does he get those marvelous toys?

5:31 PM  
Blogger Grubbs_The_Mighty said...

Babbies, I am sure babbies.

6:56 PM  
Blogger Cowboy said...

As long as your babbies dont look like Grubbs that will be ok.
Finally you posted jackass, your posts are rarer then Maddox's

8:38 PM  
Blogger Bdawg said...

It seems as though those Asian people can do about anything. I would like ther power of like complete elasticity or pliability--some shit like that--so I could freak people out by wrapping myself around trees and stuff.

12:52 PM  
Anonymous ERic said...

Ummm... Here's something for you. http://www.hansinator.net/

7:24 PM  
Blogger Noamis said...

I'd prefer a diamond voice to diamond fingernails. One supersonic scream would shatter my opponents (assuming they were made from glass).

2:11 AM  
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3:12 AM  
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3:32 PM  
Blogger Warchief said...

During my first year in college, I wanted to major in genetics. My goal was to find a way to implant people with genes that would give them naturally pink, green, blue, purple, or red (like fire engine red) hair. Then Organic Chemistry came around and I studied Psych.

Cool shit, though.

8:03 PM  
Blogger *StAtiC*9* said...

How about aliens, ala MTV's the Head?

3:10 AM  
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